Tuesday, March 31, 2009

Things Girls Hate...ok, specifically, me.

I guess I'm just feeling irritated...because I started thinking about all the things that piss me off.. all my pet peeves...all those little things that may not matter to others but drive ME crazy.
To relieve my frustrations, I've decided to vent via blog. If I mention you by name, please don't take it personally. (just kidding... no egos were bruised during the writing of this blog..) These are in no particular order as I just didn't feel like ranking them ...

People who use the word "Irregardless" - regardless is a word. Irregardless is a double negative. I feel less strongly about this as it has now become a "real" word since so many people use it. However, this makes me want to make up my own word, get a lot of people to use it and get my own dictionary entry. I need to work on it. I'll get back to you.

Leaving the toilet seat up - yeah, it's a bit rude.. but I don't really care. See? I'm not a total bitch.

Anyways - I know TEACHERS who say this. It is not grammatically correct and is like nails on a chalkboard for me.

Apropos - OK I'm an English geek.. this phrase does NOT mean "appropriately" it means "by the way". It's your lesson for the day. Oh. and people who can't be bothered to learn how to spell since they have spellcheck.

Pop up ads - I don't even think I have to explain this one.

URGENT emails - seriously. URGENT? Is someone bleeding? Did someone lose an eye? Need CPR? Here's the thing.. WHAT IF IT GOES IN THE JUNK FOLDER? You will NEVER get that Kidney!! If it's URGENT.. USE A PHONE!! Better yet.. go talk to your organ donor/workmate/person who owes you money .....IN PERSON.

Bad Drivers - we all have our moments.. but I'm mostly talking about young girls who talk on their cell phones, smoke and drive at the same time. AND the extreme elderly. It's JUST NOT SAFE PEOPLE!!

One Uppers - I went to Germany .. they went on an extensive tour of Europe for months on end. I met Flavor Flav - they were on "Flavor of Love" and nearly married him. I got cut out of a car - They were completely flattened by a steam roller but managed to survive.
I think you are picking up what I am throwing down.

Giggly Girls - women or girls who lose their shit as soon as there is testosterone in the room. Chicks who become some other being when there's someone with a penis witnessing their behaviour. Perfectly capable humans who suddenly become airheaded incompetents when there is a boy around. You know the type. AND you, too, want to slap her. Unless you are a man. THEN you want to sleep with her. I hate you both.

However, here is the coupe de grace (did I mention people who use ostentatious phrases?). THE pet peeve. The one thing that could make me go upside your head....

One of my biggest pet peeves in the world is when someone tells you that you look tired. Seriously. Why don't you just walk up to me and tell me that I look like a giant piece of crap? Essentially, that's what that means.. specifically coming from another woman.

Here's the thing: I have circles under my eyes. I ALWAYS HAVE. It's HEREDITARY.

In HIGH SCHOOL I can remember my sister and myself trying different miracle treatments from Shopper's and all.. I still have the dark circles. Just sometimes they are a little darker. YES, that means I am tired. OR it could mean that I don't have make up on... either way... you just told me that I look like something the cat dragged in. Maybe you mean well... but if you are a girl.. likely you don't.

It irritates the bejesus out of me when another woman says it.. You KNOW she is just being a bitch. Ya, you heard me. ONCE in a while there is someone that sincerely is concerned for your health (like your mom..) but most.. no. . they are just being catty. I have had various responses to that comment.. from "nope,I just look like this"... "thanks for pointing out that I look like crap"... and one time .. whilst in a particularly bitchy mood, I told some chick that I just found out that I had "tinea pedis" and was pretty upset. She looked upset for me and asked if there was anything she could do.. I said unless she had some Absorbine Jr on her.. I was a goner.
Yes, her IQ was likely in the double digits.

Likely, my biggest pet peeve is people who are rude. Just for no reason. I believe you can tell a lot about a person from they way they treat others. True show of character. Plus, if they are jerks, hopefully the Karma fairy kicks them in the ass.

So, suffice to say... you've been warned. Irregardless of anything else I've told you.

Life: While I retain my unique sense of humour, this does not pay bills. I am thinking of selling bikes from my front lawn. Thoughts?
Love: I love wine, trivia games and people who make me laugh.
Pants: I live in Barrie. I wear pants every day. Working out has kind of taken a bit of a back seat.. but.. I'm maintaining.

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